Depression Marathon Blog

My photo
Diagnosed with depression 16 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Wednesday, August 6, 2008

even when we feel like crap...

life still goes on.
even when we feel like crap
the world continues around us.

i learned long ago
the world didn't stop for me.
good knowledge to have
don't you think?

so even though i feel like crap
today
yesterday
and the day before that,
expectations must still be met.
that is the definition of expectation
after all.

expectations must be met
or i fear i will fall
away

where is away?
i do not know.

can there
be any worse
than
here?

6 comments:

Bradley said...

Excellent poem, Etta. The final words sum up so much of how I feel sometimes.

Thank you for your post.

Asdquefty said...

I like this poem.

Remember that when you're down, the only way you can go is up. Hope you feel better soon.

etta said...

thanks, guys.
just knowing somebody is out there reading about my crap is helpful.
the fact that you can relate is a bummer for you but a bonus for me.
thanks for your ongoing support.
etta

Denise said...

so sorry etta. And how true you have to keep sloshing along in the mud... it's not like breaking a leg and having a nice cast to make it better.... instead you get to walk on the leg unaided... as if there is nothing wrong at all. I wish I could bring you a nice hot casserole but all you get is my hopes and well wishes that it will cycle out of this soon.

etta said...

denise-
a casserole, huh? and what part of the midwest are you from? can't be minnesota cuz we call it hotdish here. thank you for your support. I really like the broken leg analogy. so true.

Denise said...

lol, I guess our lingo gives us away. I am actually from Utah, and I think it's a Mormon thing... I've picked up some of their culture, even though I am considered by them as, "inactive"... I consider myself a non-mormon. That is how everything is categorized here... you either belong to "the church" or you don't. You are either a Mormon.... or not. It is a strange way to view your identity.... I just have people I like... and people I don't like...and there are very few of the latter.



.