Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 16 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Wednesday, June 25, 2014

Post Marathon Dip

I'm having a little dip in my mood. I think it has to do with the marathon I just completed. I've experienced this kind of low before, after a marathon, but it's been a rare occurrence. Of course, I'm getting anxious about it. I'm anxious about the fact I don't find anything intriguing or interesting. Anxious about feeling lethargic. Anxious about feeling easily distracted and stressed. Anxious about feeling low. I'm anxious, and a little scared, that this little slide could lead to an avalanche.

Since returning from the race, I've gone to work, but I haven't been out of the house much otherwise. I skipped a social event last night, but at least I went for a walk instead. Other than that walk, I haven't done anything active. No weight lifting, no running, no swimming and no biking. About the only thing I have done a lot of is sleep. I'm not so much tired as I am bored and lethargic. Sleeping is the easiest thing to do. It's not the best, though, and I know that.

I'm going to try to do something better today. I'm planning to go for a nice, slow run this afternoon. Right now that goal feels far away, but I know I can do it. I'll at least take a walk. No matter how difficult it is to get started, I know I'll feel better after I go. I've got to go. It's beautiful outside. If I don't move, my slide may eventually turn into an avalanche. I cannot take that risk.

This too shall pass. Like the rough patches during the marathon, I have to remember that. They passed. This too shall pass.

2 comments:

A said...

Hey Etta,
So glad you did well in your last race!
I know how it is to be feeling in a funk, I have been going through a pretty bad dip myself recently.
I am in the middle of switching over medications, so I am wondering if that is part of the problem.
Plus I recently had food poisoning and when you're feeling physically unwell, it just makes mental issues that much harder.
I have had to try and schedule my crying sessions around work and school, which doesn't always work very well. My eyes have been very puffy recently. I really hope that the ramp up of my new med helps me out. Anyway, it's always good to read your updates, thank you for writing so much!

Jean Grey said...

I think that it is a truly amazing accomplishment- to run a full marathon. Even if you didn't have depression. That just makes it all the more amazing.



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