Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Sunday, November 23, 2008

I'm back--for now.

It's been a long, tough, week. I apologize for stepping away from this blog and my TSR blog. I simply have had no desire to write. That happens sometimes when I'm feeling particularly hopeless, distracted, or overwhelmed. Feeling little to no control over the intrusive thoughts I've been having has left me little to no motivation to share anything with anyone--readers, callers, visitors...anyone.
I prefer to write when I feel I have something to offer. I don't like focusing on the negative. If I've written about it (hopelessness, intrusive thoughts, discouragement) and it continues, I feel no need to rehash or restate the dilemma. I'd rather focus on facts--what's wrong and what can be done, or what I've tried to do to make it better. While I've taken steps this week to improve my situation, feeling I have little worthwhile to offer right now continues. Sometimes, I just need to battle things through by myself.

I haven't felt like writing, but I have done some artwork. I finished the following painting last night. It's called Chaos Burning. They say a picture is worth a thousand words...that sounds about right.

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