Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Thursday, April 23, 2009

dealing with a drunk

I was going to write about how I came back from my long, low day and ran 10 x 800 meters. They weren't the fastest repeats I had ever run, nor did they feel the easiest, but the point was I did them. It was going to be a really good post about all the correlations to life, moment to moment living, etc...

I thought I might write about friends and their importance in our lives, especially when we are struggling. I planned to tell you about my weekly get-together to watch Lost and share a meal with two close friends. It would have been a nice, upbeat post.

Instead, I find myself writing about a drunk. It's not going to be nice, upbeat, nor inspiring. But here goes...

I spent the better part of the last couple days dealing with a very drunk young woman. She was 6+ months sober when she made the decision to start drinking last week. Four days in detox and multiple phone calls between us led me to believe it was an isolated incident. But when she failed to phone for 3 days post discharge, I knew the isolated incident was actually an unfulfilled fantasy. With trepidation and frustration, I went to check on her. More than four hours in the ER was finally followed by another trip to detox, which is where she remains today.

This is one problem with alcoholism. We drunks have an amazing capacity to throw nails under our own tires. We don't just screw things up, we blow them up. We don't just decide to drink, we decide to die. If this young woman doesn't "get it" soon, she will quickly die, and I need to get in the way of that.

I need to stop the death. It's not a position I want to be in. It's not a role I relish. In truth, her recent self-destruction really pisses me off--and I understand it! After 6+ months of construction, she's blown-up her foundation, burned her structure down, and smoked her landlord, boss, family and friends. There is nothing and nobody left--except me. I pray I can help her put out the flames.


SK said...

This sounds like a terrible situation for all involved. I wish you and the person you mention luck.

MJ said...

There is nothing you can do. Well there is one thing. Look after yourself. Pull away and check out alanon it might be for you. Alcoholics don't have relationships of any kind. They take hostages. You need to get away from her. Her disease is already affecting you. I linked your blog from mine

Good Luck