Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Thursday, June 25, 2009

Feeling thankful

It's not Thanksgiving, but I'm feeling particularly thankful today.
I don't know why I'm feeling so grateful, but it's nice.
I like it.
I want to thank everyone today.
Gratitude feels good.

I think I am especially thankful for how I've been feeling lately.
I've been well.
Sure, I'm still tired most of the time, but my mood has been good.
And for that, I am extremely grateful.

I am so thankful for the helpers around me.
I'm grateful for my psychiatrist.
I really don't know what I'd do without her.
I'm grateful for my psychologist.
She selflessly gives me her time. Don't know where I'd be without her either.
I've said it before, but I'm going to say it again.
I have a skilled, generous, and compassionate treatment team.
Without Deb, Shawn, Dr. L. and others, I wouldn't be here today.
I very likely wouldn't be alive.

I'm alive, and I'm well.
I'm living now, not just existing.
I've had opportunity and energy for some very rewarding experiences recently.
Telling my AA story.
Running a marathon.
Spending time with my family.
All rewarding. All positive.
All non-existent if I were only existing, not living.

No wonder I'm feeling grateful.
I feel a little silly,
but I'm gushing with gratitude today.
I'm sober.
I'm feeling rather well.
I'm working, running, playing...

I'm even feeling grateful to be feeling grateful...
and I hope some of you know what I mean by that,
because that means you've felt it, too.
Gratitude feels good.

1 comment:

Anonymous said...

One of my favorite passages of scripture comes from Phillippians 4:6-8.

Do not be anxious about anything, but in everything, with prayer and supplication, with thanksgiving, make your requests known to God. And the peace of God, which surpasses all understanding, will guard your heart and mind in Christ Jesus.

Finally, whatever is true, whatever is noble, whatever is right, whatever is pure, whatever is lovely, whatever is admirable—if anything is excellent or praiseworthy—think about these things.

Grattitude, thankfulness, an accute awareness of God's presence and His concern for your life...that's what can help bring us through the rough times when everything seems so hectic and we feel so completely alone.

That's brought me 39 years in this life. :)