Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Thursday, August 13, 2009


My house is being cleaned. I'm banished to the local Caribou Coffee shop. It's too hot to run, and I have to meet my social worker within the hour anyway. I'm listening to Minnesota Public Radio on my headphones, but I can still hear two college-age women animatedly discussing their crew teams. I'm fascinated by a woman at the next table who, despite missing her left arm below the elbow, is typing faster than I. There is a woman with cancer soaking up the sun at a table outside. And there are smartly dressed medical personnel sipping, sitting and roaming about. Such is the case when observing life in a coffee shop across the street from Mayo Clinic.

It is a gorgeous, albeit hot, sunny morning. I'm feeling fortunate today. My house is being cleaned by a friend who charges me far too little for the job she does. I dislike cleaning, and when I feel bad, I just don't do it. Finding Mo, a fellow 40-days of yoga classmate, was a God-send. She does a great job, and it is so nice to come home to a clean house! I highly recommend letting someone else clean once in awhile.

I'm feeling fortunate today. I'm about to meet with my social worker, an involved member of my treatment team. And even though I don't always think I need to meet with her, it is nice to have another person keeping track of me. She sees me in my surroundings, not an office, and therefore she quickly gets a picture of how I'm doing. Sometimes, I think she knows before I do when things are sliding downhill. Like I said, it is nice to have another person keeping track of me.

I'm feeling fortunate today. The sun is shining, and I'm not one of these people taking a break from work. I'm enjoying a day off. Part-time work may be a requirement of maintaining my mental health, but at least my career choice allows me to survive fairly comfortably despite working part-time.

I'm also fortunate not to be one of the patients I see around me--the lady with cancer sunning herself outside, or the man in the wheelchair who just rolled by. I have an ambulatory illness, which right now allows me freedom from a hospital bed. I've been there, done that. I'm grateful I don't need hospitalization today.

I feel fortunate today to be able to appreciate the fortune in my life. I'm not a millionaire. I'm not famous. I'm not even without struggles. It's the simple things I often take for granted which make me fortunate. I'm grateful for my fortune today.


Miss Defective said...

What a lovely, positive post. It's often too hard for me to see the positives myself, but through your words, I was at least able to feel the positives you experienced today and that made me feel a tiny bit better. Thanks!

Jason said...

This is a great blog that you have here. I have a sports blog myself where we cover a wide range of sports. I was wondering if we could do a link exchange. We have to stick together.