Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Tuesday, November 24, 2009

one of those days

I'm having one of those totally useless days. Although I'm sure my therapist could re-frame it into some sort of positive, to me this day has so far been totally useless. I have a short list of things to do, including running a speed workout, but I've yet to get out of my pajamas.

I'm tired, I guess, although I can't imagine why. When my alarm went off this morning, I was in a deep sleep. I barely remember shutting it off. Puck got me out of bed an hour later, and I had my usual breakfast and coffee. I don't think I actually woke up though. Within another hour I was back in bed sound asleep. Weird. I remember awakening a few times after that, but never longer than to just roll over and continue my slumber. I didn't get out of bed until 12:30! I can't remember the last time I slept an entire morning away! College maybe? Yikes!

Once up, I figured I'd certainly feel ready and useful. That hasn't happened either. Still in my pj's. Still tired. Still useless. I'm hoping to come around soon, as I'd really like to get something done. I'd really like to run, or swim, or bike, or even go for a walk! Of course, that will require getting my leaden butt out of this chair. Whew! Lead is really, really heavy.

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