Depression Marathon Blog

My photo
Diagnosed with depression 17 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Thursday, August 19, 2010

Still selling.

A big thank you to those of you who left such thoughtful comments on my last post. I'm still unpacking and sorting through things to sell. The big sale starts tomorrow. I can't wait. I never expected I'd feel so anxious to get rid of my stuff, but I can't wait to get it off my hands and out of my soul. Junk. Junk cluttering my house, but it feels like it's cluttering my soul. I'm ready to lighten up.

I sold another big item today--my trumpet. I played trumpet in high school and a little bit in college. I owned that instrument since I first learned to play. It was at least 25 years old, but it was in pristine condition. And now my co-worker's son will learn to play on it, too. I feel good about that.

It's kind of funny, now that I think about it. The people who purchased my car bought it for their 17 year old daughter. It's her first car, but in order to drive it she'll have to learn to drive a stick shift. My stuff is being used for learning left and right! That's kind of cool.

People keep asking me why I'm selling so much stuff. I think my parents are even a little worried. That's kind of funny. Besides feeling overwhelmed with old things and old memories, I want to be able to pick up and leave at any time. I can't do that if my house is loaded with stuff. Maybe I'm feeling a little restless. Maybe I'm having a mid-life crisis. I don't really care. Lightening my load feels good, and I'm going to keep doing it until I'm done. And I'm not done yet.


Maggie Beth said...

Etta ~ your family may be concerned that you are "giving away" your stuff because you are planning on harming yourself. Be sure and reassure them that you are in a good place and this is a good thing.

I encourage you as you sell each item and it leaves ~ whisper in your heart, "I release you and all you mean to me. Go with peace and bless someone else."

I know it sound goofy as hell but it works!!! Everytime I donate stuff to the thrift store I always whisper that in my heart.

The BEST was when I stood outside the big thrift store truck that came to take some furniture ~ before they shut the truck door I said, "WAIT! WAIT!!" and I stood there staring into the truck. Then I said, "OK!" One of the men looked at me with pity, "Hard to let go isn't. Funny how we get attached to stuff."

It felt great to smile and honestly say, "NOPE! Just the opposite! I can release it easily!! I was just praying that these items bless their new owners as they blessed me." The man stared at me a long moment and finally said, "I think that is one of the coolest things I've ever heard."

May all that leaves your home during this time, leave in peace AND leave behind peace!!

I'll be thinking good thoughts tomorrow! May you end the day with a FULL wallet, empty house and a happy, full heart....


Anonymous said...

I'm glad you're feeling good about this. Good luck at your sale tomorrow! (I love garage sales.)

Wishing you well,

Mohican said...

I like the way your attitude today has changed from yesterday. This is indeed a soul-cleansing and freeing experience. I'm not a fan of phrases like "Today is the first day of the rest of your life", but the thought behind it applies. Good luck, and start making plans on what to do with all that money!

Jen Daisybee said...

I can understand why you would want to lighten the load of stuff in your life and get rid of clutter. I tend to collect clutter and I know how it can add to depression, feeling disorganized and overwhelmed, etc.

I hope your sale goes well!!

Lauren Alissa Hunter said...

I commend you on your de-cluttering. I did something similar earlier this year when I made a spur of the moment decision to quit my job and start traveling indefinitely. Too often "stuff" becomes a burden and an obstacle. I think this is a very positive step for you!