Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 16 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Monday, November 1, 2010

Catching up

I spent the day yesterday cleaning my house. I had a lot of catching up to do. Cleaning is one of my least favorite things to do. When I'm training hard and working, it is way, way at the bottom of my list of priorities. So I hadn't cleaned in quite awhile, and my house was due. Needless to say, I'm much happier with how my house looks and feels today. I like a clean house. I just don't like to be the one cleaning it!

Today I had a short day at work. I only had one patient in the morning. My afternoon got cancelled, so I ran some errands, got my oil changed, and went swimming instead. Today was supposed to be a rest day, but after cleaning yesterday I had no desire to go exercise. I sat and watched football and baseball instead. It was one of those low motivation days. I hate those days.

I think my low motivation yesterday was actually carried over from Saturday night. I did go to the Halloween party. I decided to put my wet suit to good use and went as a scuba diver. I knew that wet suit would come in handy! God only knows if it will ever be used for a triathlon again! I only stayed at the party for a couple of hours, but I did get some nice compliments--wet suits leave little to the imagination, after all. As was the case yesterday, when I couldn't get interested in anything, I just couldn't get very interested in the party.

I'm hoping this lack of interest, and the isolating I wrote of in my last post, isn't a foreboding sign of things to come. I am currently cutting back on one of my meds, and my doctor wanted to do it much slower than I did (of course) for this very reason. She's very cautious when it comes to my mood. I guess that's a good thing, and I do appreciate it. If this is the beginning of a little dip, I don't think it's the med change. More likely, it's a hormonal thing, and hopefully it will be different in about one week. But I'm definitely on guard.

Well, I think you're caught up. Now it's time for me to go catch up on my bills before game 5 of the World Series begins. Thank God the Yankees aren't in it again! Sorry, Yankee fans...

1 comment:

The Blue Morpho said...

I try hard to fight my urge to isolate. I like people so much ... but my social anxiety makes people so scary. Still, I have to fight it because when I get isolated I feel everything more acutely. I hope you get through this down period really soon, and that the med change works out for you.
Adventures in Anxiety Land



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