Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 17 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Thursday, March 3, 2011

The F-word

If there is such a thing as Delayed Onset Fatigue, stemming from a completed marathon almost two weeks past, I think I've got it. Today has been a tough, tough day. I have struggled with fatigue all week, but today I really bonked. After sleeping 8+ hours overnight, I went back to bed shortly after getting up and slept another two hours. Somehow I dragged myself out for my tempo run before showering and going back to bed. And I slept again. When I awoke, around 1:30 PM, I managed to get in a brief grocery shopping trip. I wasn't gone 60 minutes before I started to feel like I was about to drop. I made it home and drop is exactly what I did. It's four hours later, and I just got up. I'm hoping to finish this post before I fall asleep again.

Phew! I hate feeling this fatigued (the F-word). I'm so glad I had the day off. If I'd had to work today, I would have been in trouble. I'm not sure why this fatigue has set in so deeply. I feel tired, worn out, flat, and heavy. It got so bad today, I could barely tolerate the length of my shower. It was exhausting and exasperating! I was really distressed about it for awhile. Thankfully, I let go of that distress. It wasn't doing me any good. It only made things worse. And I'm feeling a little more hopeful now. After all, tomorrow is a new day, and eventually this has to pass. Right? God, I hope so.

1 comment:

M said...

Glad you were able to let go of worrying about being exhausted and just BE exhausted. I bet you'll be amazed how much better you feel after you have another full night's sleep...I always am amazed at what good sleep can do!



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