Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 17 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Tuesday, September 6, 2011

The Updates

The long weekend with my friend D went well, although not as swimmingly as in the past. There was a simple reason. D's 30-year-old son joined us at the lake. He's a nice guy, and he likes me, but it made things different. First of all, he's a very intense young man. I'm not used to being around intense people. It was a little tiring.

There were also some moments of tension. I think D wanted to please both of us and/or didn't want to offend either of us. For example, I wanted to take D out for breakfast on Sunday, just the two of us, but he thought it would be rude to leave his 30-year-old son home alone. I disagreed. I ended up going out with my parents instead.

Some of the tension was of my own making. D's divided attention caused me to worry. My fears of being hurt reared their ugly head. I had to work hard to accept the situation as it was, accept D's divided attention, and to not read anything into that divided attention (for example, thinking it meant I was not liked). By the end of the weekend, I accomplished that. It was, overall, a good weekend once again.

The other update is not so promising. I am injured again. Actually, I tweaked my knee during my last marathon, and it's been bothering me ever since. I have a longstanding, slight meniscus tear in my right knee, and I think I irritated it coming down one of the long, steep hills during the race. I actually didn't run at all during the last week. I biked, swam, or lifted weights everyday instead. By Saturday, the pain was significantly less.

As per my plan, I set out for my usual long run on Saturday. D's son is also training for a marathon, and we were both scheduled to go 14 miles. Unfortunately, despite feeling good prior to the run, my knee flared up around 4 miles. I made it 8 miles, but that was it. And I payed for it later.

I'm taking another break from running now. I will treat myself with some ultrasound, get a massage, and cross-train again. It's already better than it was over the weekend, but I'm worried. I don't know how soon I'll be able to run again.

Despite my injury, my mood is still holding steady. I'm grateful for that. I'm also grateful for all of you readers. You really keep me going. You have no idea! I have a busy week ahead. I'm hoping things go smoothly.


Kinza said...

Not easy spending extended time with a 30 years old son... but, at least you are wanted to spend time with him. It is a good sign that D has a nice relationship with his adult son! It would be a miracle if atmosphere had been nothing idyllic...

Anonymous said...

The fact D desired to introduce you to his son is HUGE - but a whole weekend together? WOW! ~ I don't think you have to worry about D "not liking you" :)

And imagine Etta!? He STILL introduced his son to you even after you told him your "SECRET" ~ (HUGE SMILE!)

I am so happy for you ~ sounds like the two of you are building a relationship in the right manner.

RE: your bod ~ Be careful and wise.

Maggie Beth ~