Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Saturday, November 19, 2011

Riding the coaster

Going up? Maybe. It's hard to say. I've given up trying to figure it out. Instead I'm focused on staying on the ride. I'm strapped in. My butt is firmly planted in the seat. It's a temporary ride, as one of my readers reminded me, and I just need to hang on. Hanging on tight, I am.

I've been doing what I need to do. Work has been extremely busy lately, which is good, although my low mood made it a bit more challenging. Fortunately, work also provided a distraction from the darkness. I may not have been quite as efficient over the past couple days, but I saw to the needs of all of my patients nonetheless. I've got some really neat people on my caseload, and they certainly help me keep life in perspective.

With my mood being so off, I've let a lot of things slide away from work. My house, for example, needs some assistance. It's a mess. Cleaning, laundry, vacuuming, and dusting all await my response. My front yard needs to be raked--still. I'm lucky it hasn't snowed. And Puck is a constant reminder that I need to keep moving. If not for my sake, for his. Perhaps today will allow me to address at least one of these concerns.

One thing at a time, one day at a time. That's where I'm focused. I'm riding the rollercoaster. I'm strapped in and hanging on tight. Soon, I expect the bumps will smooth and the coaster will slowly roll to a nice, quiet stop. I'm looking forward to that.

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