Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Tuesday, March 26, 2013

Better? Maybe.

The fatigue and lethargy saga continues. I did talk things over with my doctor, via e-mail, a couple days ago. She did order some blood work, which I had drawn today. I don't yet know the results.

Of course, I hope I'm fine, and nothing major shows up in the results, but I have to admit, it would be kind of relieving to find out I'm anemic. If that were the case, I'd at least have an easily fixable reason behind the fatigue and terrible running. Fixable...that's what I'm really looking for.

I'm actually feeling a tiny bit better. I had a decent run on Sunday. It was a 7-miler. I started slowly, but I was able to speed up to a good pace for the middle miles prior to slowing down again over the final mile. I didn't feel perfect. I wasn't totally back, but it was so much better than Saturday's run, I felt encouraged.

Unfortunately tonight's run brought my enthusiasm down a frustrating notch once again. Today's schedule called for a relaxed 8-miler. I left the house in a hopeful mood. Hope turned to frustration when I developed serious, bilateral side-stitches within 5 blocks of my home! The cramping brought me to a halt 3 times in the first mile. I must have looked pretty funny doubled over on the side of the road, as I tried to stretch and relax the cramping away.

I succeeded in relieving the left side-stitch, but the right side would not unknot itself for the remainder of my run. I slowly struggled through the first three miles and was preparing to bag the entire effort when I felt some relief. Though the cramp never left, I was able to hold a more decent pace for awhile, and I finished my run. I'm happy about that.

I figure this fatigue has to end at some point in time. Maybe it's already starting to improve. After all, I was actually able to run today, even if it wasn't the most comfortable experience, and that's better than I could muster last Tuesday.

I leave the house with positive expectations every time I run. I've been through similar episodes in the past, and ultimately they've all resolved as mysteriously as they first appeared. So I'm hopeful. Either the blood work will indicate a solution, or time will heal all. I just have to wait and see.


Tina Fariss Barbour said...

I admire your dedication to running, and I'm glad you're feeling better, even if only a little bit.

I'm laid up from exercise with a broken bone in my foot, and have to be on crutches for at least 3 more weeks and in a boot for who knows how long. I'm trying to hold on to the fact that this is a temporary situation!

etta said...

Bummer, Tina! I hope you heal quickly. Can you swim or ride a bike in the meantime? Take it easy and keep going with the "It's temporary," thought.