Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 17 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Monday, November 24, 2014

Worry Thoughts

I'm being silly. I know that. I'm staying awake nights worrying about what I said, and more importantly didn't say, during filming last Thursday. Did I highlight the stigma enough? Was I compassionate enough? Was I accurate in my description of the variety of symptoms? Did I get across how isolating and debilitating this illness can be? And on, and on, and on... Worry thoughts. I'm being silly. Right?

In other news, my mood remains good. I am getting a little worn out by the pain from my oral surgery on Friday. Nevertheless I returned to work today, swollen face and all. I made it five hours before it got to be too much. I actually think the talking I did with my patients and coworkers helped my face swelling decrease a bit. I think I look better now than when I went to work this morning.

The reason I think the mouth pain has worn me down is because I've noticed I feel overwhelmed with less provocation. Work was a little overwhelming today, though it wasn't at all difficult. I'm also a bit overwhelmed by what's on my to-do list for tomorrow, even though there's not that much to do. Despite that I'm feeling like I want to curl up on the sofa and avoid it all.

Feeling overwhelmed can be an early warning sign that things aren't going well, so I'm paying close attention to my mood and doing what I can to stay on an even keel. That's why tomorrow you'll find me putting one foot in front of the other and crossing off one errand after another. Controlling what I can control is one important piece of maintaining my mood stability.

1 comment:

Tina Fariss Barbour said...

I hope your pain and discomfort from the oral surgery has calmed down. I tend to easily feel overwhelmed, and then I get less accomplished and feel worse about it. I like your way of putting one foot in front of the other and doing one thing at a time.



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