Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 19 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Sunday, March 8, 2015

Springing Ahead

I don't know about you, but I hate losing an hour of sleep "springing ahead" every Spring. I feel like it takes me until Fall to adapt to that lost hour. It's already late afternoon, too soon, and my body is confused. Sure it's nice to stay sunny later in the day, but I'm a morning person. I like seeing the sun when I get out of bed, too. Some states don't bother changing their clocks. I wish my state was one of them.

That being said, it is a beautiful, sunny, warmer day today. We are finally climbing out of the deep freeze up here in the North. I ran outside with Jet and soaked in the warm, brilliant rays this morning. Unfortunately, that was about the only good thing that came out of my run today. I was scheduled to go 8 miles but barely made it, slowly, to six. My legs were dead. It's okay, though. The other four runs this week were quite good.

I'm not surprised my legs didn't respond today. I challenged myself this week with a lot of faster miles. I was on the treadmill for the previous four runs, and I generally pushed it. I'm still taking walk breaks, but my pace has increased fairly dramatically, and my walk breaks have been fewer. I even did some half mile repeats one day. Speed work! How fun! Even yesterday, after working all day, I was motivated and energetic enough to get a quick 5 miler done. So the dead legs this morning actually made perfect sense. I'm accepting it, looking forward to a rest day, and moving on.

One thing I'm struggling to accept, however, is my weight. I don't like feeling so heavy when I run. I've been working hard to monitor and control my intake, while exercising regularly and strenuously, for almost 30 days now, and I've only lost 3 pounds. I was hoping for a more dramatic response to my behavior changes. I have 7 pounds yet to lose, and at this rate, it will be racing season before I drop those last few pounds, if at all! My jeans are fitting better, which is nice, but I'm still too self conscious to squeeze into my running attire. I'm not giving up on the process. It's just taking a lot longer than I had hoped.

My mood remains good. My life continues on its pleasantly boring track, just the way I like it. I've taken the opportunity to apply for a regular, benefited, physical therapy position, rather than working on-call without benefits as I currently do, at a new senior facility. I expect I will hear back from them soon, as I have the experience for which they are advertising. It's always exciting to pursue something new. I'll let you know if anything comes of my application. Spring forward and carry on, friends.

1 comment:

Irene said...

Etta, I hope you get what you want and kudos to you for being able to work toward these things.