Depression Marathon Blog

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Diagnosed with depression 17 years ago, I lost the life I once knew, but in the process re-created a better me. I am alive and functional today because of my dog, my treatment team, my sobriety, and my willingness to re-create myself within the confines of this illness. I hate the illness, but I'm grateful for the person I've become and the opportunities I've seized because of it. I hope writing a depression blog will reduce stigma and improve the understanding and treatment of people with mental illness. All original content copyright to me: etta. Enjoy your visit!

Sunday, March 27, 2016

Survival

Sitting here drinking my coffee this morning, I'm tired but satisfied. I survived my very busy week. And while I didn't do so perfectly, I made it. My house is a bit of a mess, the laundry needs to be done, Jet needs some attention and exercise, my bills need to be paid, and I need some groceries, but hey, I survived.

Looking back, I worked 5 of the last 6 days, got in a couple of cycling classes, and made it to one 12-step meeting. I tackled an urgent medical situation and a sick friend. I traveled 182 miles round trip to see an expert regarding the ongoing saga with my teeth, specifically my missing canine. And I checked in with my psychiatrist.

My mood is okay. I've been so focused on going forward and doing what I needed to do next, I don't think I had much time to even consider my mood. Maybe that's fine. As I sit here now, checking in with myself, I think I'm okay. Like I said, I'm tired. I'd really like to crawl back into bed, but I've got a lot to do today before returning to work tomorrow.

It was an abnormal week for me. I had more time and energy constraints. I missed about half my normal amount of exercise, including all but one of the therapeutic (for both of us) walks with Jet. I had to cancel my hour with a private patient I assist. I normally attend three, not just one, 12-step meetings. And like I said my bills, chores, and errands were all put on hold.

Today getting groceries is a priority. As my stock dwindled this week, and as my fatigue rose, I found myself eating more and more junk. Sugar is my primary foe. I crave it like mad and put up only cursory defense when my energy is low. Unfortunately, I indulged those cravings these last couple of days, and as is typical, I ended up feeling like crud, physically and mentally, afterward. It's time to get some better nutritional options back into my house.

I'm looking forward to what I hope will be a slightly less busy, less stressful week ahead. I will be working four days, but only two in a row, as I have Wednesday off. I'm already committed to attending at least two meetings, as I am actually leading one. Finally, I plan to find more time for Jet and exercise and less time for ice cream! I'll let you know how it goes. Carry on, my friends.

3 comments:

paullamb said...

Distraction and routine always work for me, keeping me from spending too much time inside my head. I hope your week is what you need it to be.

Anna said...

Etta, we've had amazingly similar weeks. Here too, my house is a wreck, pets are neglected, vital routine is destroyed and fridge is empty--all in a week's work, right?! Thank you for reminding me that I am not alone! I hope next week is much quieter. Soldier on!! Anna

HBF said...

I can't even remember our old "productive" routine here but I know I miss it! Wishing you well, good luck :)



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